Big Announcement: You Don't Want to Miss This

Episode 23: The Alchemy of Authenticity – Launching ALAU and Decolonizing Capitalism

In this episode, Melissa Whittington shares a pivotal moment in her journey—announcing the launch of her personal brand, ALAU: The Alchemy of Authenticity. Melissa dives deep into her personal story of leaving the church, deconstructing colonialism and patriarchy, and embracing true authenticity in both life and business.

She opens up about the romanticized version of healing she once believed in and how real transformation comes from facing the shadows and making the hard choices. Melissa discusses the importance of decolonizing capitalism, breaking generational curses, and listening to Indigenous leaders as we build a more authentic and equitable world. Tune in to explore how living in alignment and embracing authenticity leads to a life of true abundance, self-expression, and empowerment.

Key topics:

• The launch of ALAU: A personal brand focused on authenticity and ethical living
• How decolonizing capitalism and uplifting Indigenous voices are at the core of ALAU's mission
• The reality of personal growth, shadow work, and breaking generational curses
• Why true transformation requires choosing something different in each moment of opportunity
• How Melissa's journey from healing to self-actualization is shaping her mission and her brand

Fill out the contact for on this page to join the email list and stay in the loop! 

Transcript

1:15

(Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai. Go Unlimited to remove this message.) Aloha, welcome back to Leaving the Church to Find God. I am so thrilled to have you here. Today, I'm going to talk about something that's not only deeply personal, but also deeply significant. And as most of you know, this podcast started out as a way for me to share my story and a platform for others to share their story of leaving the church and finding whatever form of God or spirituality that has called to them since. But it has really evolved into an expression of authentic living and tuning into one's higher self. It has just continues to become something so expansive and so beautiful. And I really appreciate you being here to share it all with me. Today, I have a very big announcement, but I'm also going to go deep into the basis of everything that I'm working on and will be talking about. So, buckle up. We're going deep today, guys. Okay, bear with me today. There are some sounds of nature in the background. I have been all over this island today looking for a nice, beautiful, and quiet place to have this conversation. And the irony I can't even go into of how it has just led me back to home. So, here I am. And it's a little warm in this room, so I'm just letting the sound of the frogs and the river and everything be a part of our story today. So, here I speak a lot about authenticity, really, on all of my platforms. And that in its purest form, it requires us to tune into who we really are. It's a path that challenges us to make really hard choices sometimes. And those are choices in relationships, in our work, in our life. And sometimes these choices can feel like it's just ripping us away from everything that we know, everything that feels safe. It's often painful, and it's often difficult. And I can tell you from experience that it's also incredibly rewarding. Just knowing that I was going to have this conversation with you today, I could feel this energy, this electricity going through my veins, through my whole body. It's a feeling that's been unmatched by any other in my life. It was just this beautiful confirmation and encouragement that this conversation is important and that it's meant to be had. And that, you know, this speaking of hard choices may not appeal to everyone. And that's perfectly fine. We all have our version of what authenticity is. We all have our own life path. But I also know that if I'm inspired to share this, it's because there are people who are inspired to really dig deep and find out who they truly are and live in a life and a path that's in alignment with that truth. And, you know, I say that it's hard because it is like, you know, they say so much that we'll choose a familiar hell over stepping into an unknown that could provide like everything that we've always desired. And that's so true. And as I've spoken before about the brain and how it works and how we've evolved, you know, that is a safety mechanism, right? No, staying in what's known has previously been something that's kept us safe as humans. And we're also meant to evolve. And those evolutions, especially in the brain, involve choices. It involves making different choices, choices that sometimes feel unnatural. And I really went into this in the intuition versus instinct episode. If you wanted to back into that to get a better idea of what I'm talking about, as far as like really knowing what's intuition and what is just programmed beliefs or habits or something that's in our DNA that's just, you know, programmed into us. And so I'm going to, I have so many things to get into today. I'm going to go over things deeply and lightly. But don't worry, anything that is unfamiliar that I haven't spoken to before, I will go into in another episode and get deeper into anything that I'm not going to get into is because I already have, and there's already an episode existing for that. So don't worry, it's all in there. And when I say making hard choices, it can, it can feel like something that like, Oh, why would I want to do that? Right? But choosing authenticity, it, while it might mean walking away from relationships that no longer service or stepping into roles that are aligned with who we are, rather than what society expects of us, it also means stepping into what our heart, what our soul truly desires. And there is nothing more rewarding than that. And it can be seen as selfish or self-serving. But what I've learned, the more I tap into my authentic truth, the more it really exposes, it expresses the connectivity I have to everything, to everything that I am, to everything in the world around me, to every person around me, we're all connected. And the deeper we get, the closer we get to our personal truth, the truth that's inside of us, this divine energy that creates life and creates everything, the energy that creates worlds, right? The more we tap into that, it doesn't bring us into places of selfishness. It brings us more into alignment with that community, the universal like unity that is within us. And that is around us knowing that we're connected, knowing that everything that benefits something else is also benefiting us. And when we're taking care of ourselves and living our truth, it's benefiting other people and other things around us. So it's a ripple effect and it's, and it really truly is all, all connected. While choosing authenticity might mean walking away from things that don't serve us, it means walking towards things that do serve us, that not only serve us, but serve the collective and the higher good, right? And in business, it means building something that reflects our core values. If even when it's not the most profitable or the easiest route, even speaking up for what's right, even when it's not popular or it's going to cause backlash, perhaps from people in your community. For me, that's just information, right? If speaking your truth causes someone to not like you or someone to speak ill about you, then I feel like that's really valuable information about what is really going to serve you in your life and what isn't. So when I say hard choices, it's hard because it's the unfamiliar. But in this life of authenticity, in this deep, true knowing and connection with one's highest self, there's a trust that develops through time. The more we rely on this, the more we can build that trust. And we get to a point where surrender is hard anymore. Unfortunately, getting to that point often means a lot of hard things, but that's my story. It may be different for you. The path is different for so many people. There are people like Michael Singer and Eckhart Tolle, who had an awakening and a connection to their divine self in a moment. And for some of us, there's a lot more layers there that we need to get through to really find our true selves. And I have really come to understand that that's my purpose right now. I can't say it's my only purpose because I feel purpose in so many things that I do and interactions that I have. But I know that there's a purpose in me sharing this message and me standing for truth, for authenticity, not just for myself, but for the sake of the future, for the sake of humanity, for the sake of the planet, for the sake of all of us. So it, yes, hard choices. Yes, those are there, but also very rewarding paths, very rewarding experiences as a result of those hard choices. A lot of times when breaking free of these systems, you know, whether it's religious systems or colonialism or patriarchy, or a combination of them all, because, you know, they're all married in so many ways, it can often lead to what's called a dark night of the soul. So if you're in this experience, if you've been following along episode after episode, and your beliefs are starting to change or unwind, and you're really starting to question what you previously thought is truth, it can lead to what this dark night of the soul. And on this path to authenticity, that is really common. And it doesn't mean that you're doing something wrong. Often in the church, when things start to go awry, we're taught that that means that we're out of the will of God, or we're doing something wrong. But it actually, when you're having this dark night of the soul, it means that you're on the right path. And it takes looking at those things, looking at your thoughts and beliefs, really taking a cold hard look at them to see the truth that's behind them. And I always say that your truth is in the shadows. And I'm going to do a whole episode on shadow work and what that means. But for now, we'll just say that the shadows are the places where we're not, where we don't want to look. They're mostly developed in childhood. Someone rejects a part of us, you know, that which causes us to reject that part of ourselves. And then it stays in the dark. And it is informing so many of our actions and choices and beliefs, without us even knowing that it's there because it's in the dark. But the thing is, is when we shine light on that, and our light is internal, you know, this little light of mine, right? Let's let it shine. When we shine light on those shadows, then they're illuminated. And it's no longer controlling us in that way. When everything familiar starts to break down, and we're left with the raw truth of who we are and what we believe there, this is where our personal values become crystal clear, right? Not the values that we've been taught to uphold, but the ones that arise from our deepest knowing. Right now, the coaching industry and mentoring industry is blowing up. It's already become a multi-billion dollar industry. And I'm absolutely not throwing shade on that. There's so much value to be had. I've found value in it myself. But also, much of what's sold is this winning the game of life, right? It's winning, you know, get the perfect body, get the perfect relationship, have the perfect job, have all the money, have all the wealth. And while sure, those things are fun, it's not the core of who we are. The core of who we are will lead us to those things, to the things that we desire. For some of us, that's not even what we desire. But when we get to that core, it leads us to our highest desires. But in order to get to those highest desires, there has to be a letting go of these expectations. And I'm not saying don't desire more, don't have dreams, definitely dream big. I am all about dreaming big, as you'll continue to discover throughout this episode. But knowing that that's not the purpose, there is no winning this game. The game that we've been taught to win is developed by oppressive systems, right? It's the result, it's symptoms of these oppressive systems of patriarchy and colonialism and etc. So like with women, you know, there's this never thin enough, and then people starve themselves and get super thin. And then the next fad is having big butts and big boobs. And so then they go get surgery to have the big butts and the big boobs. And everything is always changing, like thin brows, thick brows, there is no winning the game. There is no amount of money that's going to make you feel safe. There is no amount of riches or amount of people surrounding you that are going to make you feel safe. Safety is something that happens within. And to find that safety, it takes making hard choices, it takes doing the work, it takes whether that work is dealing with trauma and therapy, which I highly recommend with the right therapist, doing somatic work, also something I recommend, you know, there's so many ways to access this. And I don't feel like there is one answer. I feel like there are different answers for everyone. There's so many tools and everyone can put in their toolbox, what works for them. There isn't just one path or one way that defeats the whole purpose of this, this matrix that we're in, right, which is experience and expansion and growth. And that growth doesn't happen without contrast, which, you know, I will get further into for sure, I'm going to do a whole episode about contrast, but that it is what we desire is to be able to we get so much pleasure in solving problems, right. But we want to be able to solve these problems with ease and with joy, like have fun with solving these problems, not let us bring us into a state of hopelessness and suffering, which is often what's in the media, it's what we hear, it's what we see everywhere. And it's really easy to get it caught up in that energy, like I was talking about last week, about the you know, the effects of having a negative person in the room. It's the same thing, like that negativity, it's a lot easier to go down into the negative hole than it is to rise up. And because rising up takes making choices that that people haven't made before, or at least that nobody around you has made before. It takes doing the hard things, right. And so the coaching industry is great. There's a lot of a lot of gifts to be found there. But also like this ideal life that's being sold, it's you can't win this game, there is no winning because there is no finish line, right. And it's the same with healing. I had totally romanticized my healing journey when I moved to Maui 18 years ago. You know, I had this idea, I had been reading these books in the way of the Peaceful Warrior, which I still love and swear by that book. I've read it many times, although it has been a while. But it's just this romantic idea of this realizations and opening and it all seems so beautiful. And healing can can be a lot of fun. There's so much relief and joy in peeling away layers and finding our true selves. But this idealized version of healing, that's just this beautiful journey. Looking back on it, yes, it is. It's very beautiful. But in the moment, it can feel really, really difficult and really challenging. And it causes us to face parts of ourselves that we've been avoiding for a really long time. So I really feel a pull to lead people through this process because I have been through it. I'm still going through it. It's it's never ending. And I love that. I love that about my life. I know that I will continue to blossom and unfold and every unfolding is more beautiful than the one before it. But that doesn't negate where I am now. And I have come a long way and I've made so many of these hard choices. And I really, really am starting to reap the rewards of that greater than I have before. I noticed a change in my thinking in the way that I feel about things. You know, I've been through the whole they talk about when you heal the inner child, the next comes the angry teenager. And it's so true. Like, I've just really had to embrace my anger and let it out and let it show in all the ways that it wanted to show and not judge it and not shame it. And knowing that there's another side, there's the other side of it. And I feel like I've really reached that other side and that things that have angered me in the past or that I've ruminated on so many times really are just losing their their hold on me. Like I'm losing the attachment to those feelings, to that being victimized, being done wrong by life. And sure, there were a lot of things that were done wrong, like life has been challenging. But I can see now the beauty and the purpose of every one of those challenges. And I absolutely love where they've led me to. I had a recent breathwork experience the last time I was there. It was so profound. It was so powerful. And I just felt so much gratitude and joy for the pain. I felt so much. I still do. Like, I'm in awe. I'm in awe of life and the things that have had to unfold and come together for me to be where I am and to feel the way that I do and to know the things that I know. And I'm so grateful for it. I'm grateful for every person that that did me wrong. I'm grateful for every pain, every hardship, also for all the pleasure and the joy and the fun. Of course, those things are easy to appreciate, but I also really appreciate all of it. All of it. It's all beautiful. And it's all part of my journey. And it's all part of my story. So yes, looking back, it's beautiful. The journey, the healing journey is beautiful. But it's much like the lotus, right? That it grows in the mud. And you've got the mud and it takes that murky environment for this beautiful lotus to form and to bloom. And that's what it feels like. I'm really starting to see the mud as something truly beautiful and truly rewarding. It feels like the honor of my life right now to invite anyone who is interested to come into this. I mean, you're already here. You're already listening. So there's something in here that you feel drawn to. And I really love that. It feels so great to be of service and to live in purpose. But none of that was intentional. None of that was planned. I've just started showing up authentically and follow the nudges and go where I'm led. And I can see now how it has just brought me exactly where I'm supposed to be. So one of the really important parts of this journey for me has been decolonization. And I still have so much work to do in this area. But decolonization and uplifting Indigenous leaders and uplifting Indigenous voices are such a big part of this path that I'm on. As I've journeyed through deconstruction, I've realized how deep the roots of colonialism, patriarchy, and religion run into us, into our DNA, into our systems, into everything that we live. And decolonization is a vital part of the process. It's not about replacing one system with the other. It's about dismantling the systems that have oppressed and returning to the wisdom that has been silenced for far too long. The church missionaries and colonial systems have often told us and others what they think we need. But true decolonization begins with listening. It's about turning to Indigenous leaders, to marginalized voices, and asking them what they need. It's about understanding that their wisdom has always been there. And it's our role to uplift, support, and listen, not to just impose the solutions. Because our solutions come from these systems that we've been indoctrinated by. So we cannot see the solutions that we don't know. Like you don't know what you don't know, right? And there's no fault for that. Some people want to be like, oh, why didn't you know that what you were doing was racist or oppressive or whatever? You don't know what you don't know. And if you did know, I'm glad that you're course correcting now, right? But you don't know what you don't know. And we can't know the things that we were never taught or experienced unless we, for one, tune in to our inner knowing. Because it knows everything, right? That part of us knows everything. But also listening to these voices, to the wisdom keepers, to the storytellers that have passed down this wisdom, that have held on to this wisdom with everything that they have. I've been reading this book called Braiding Sweetgrass, and it's such a beautiful book. I highly recommend it to anybody and everybody. It's just such an important part of this message and how important it is for us to live in right relationship with the world around us. You know, I talk about nature and our relationship with nature so often. And that's so much of what Indigenous wisdom brings us, is that we're in relationship with nature, you know? So we are nature. We're animals, right? We're made from this earth. And in our blood is iron. And iron, the only place that it can be found outside of what has been created here, is in the stars. We are made of stardust. What we came from, what we're built from, came from the stars. And it's created us in this beautiful earth that we live on. So just understanding that relationship, and that takes a lot because it's in our food systems, it's in our medicine systems, it's in how we treat each other, it's in capitalism. And no, this is not an anti-capitalism rant by any means. Because so much of this conversation about returning to Indigenous wisdom is about fighting and fighting the oppressors. But I believe that so much more can be accomplished in working in unity and working together. And by lifting Indigenous voices, by lifting minority voices, those who have been marginalized, we start to bring balance back into this system of life that we're working in. One of the most powerful realizations and experiences that I have had has been the experience of alchemy. Of understanding that we are the energy that creates worlds. And we're given things in life. Amanda Francis refers to it as turning shit into gold. And I feel like that's what happens. And that's what's always happened. Like, life can come with all these things, and we can take the shit and we can turn it into gold. Or we can just get covered in shit and let it take us down. But either way, it's going to keep coming. So it's up to us what we do with that. And the beauty is, is that energy is movable. And we can transform it. We can transmute it into something. And we're these amazing vessels of co-creation, where divine creation meets physical form. And within us, we have this power to alchemize energies, to alchemize pain into joy, to alchemize oppression into uplifting, beautiful, wonderfulness that benefits everyone, right? We have the choice. And with that, I will announce something that I've been kind of alluding to for a while now, which is the official launch of my personal brand, Allow. Allow is the alchemy of authenticity. And for me, it's more than a business. It's my mission. It's my mission to decolonize capitalism, to build an empire that uplifts everyone that it touches. It's a space where we can explore what it means to live authentically, and where we can deconstruct old systems and create new ways of thriving and living together in harmony. For me, part of my own journey in authenticity has been surrendering to my deepest desire to create. It's always been my mind, if I had enough money, if I had enough time, you know, I'm going to build the studio, I'm going to sculpt, I'm going to create. And I've always had a call to create and to be an artist. And this year, I've just fully embraced it. I've had all this time that I didn't ask for. You know, I've talked about the fires and everything that's been happening on Maui, and it's left a gap, you know, of employment and things that I face. But instead of being like, my God, I just got over the pandemic, here it is again. It's like, no, this is happening for a reason. I know the work that I've done. I know who I am. And I know my power. And I know that this is part of the alchemy of me. This is part of what is shaping me into who I'm meant to become. And I surrendered to this difficulty, this trial, this pain, and it has led me to the most obvious place, which is fully embracing myself as a role model, as a mentor, and as an artist. And I've always, you know, loved ceramics, I love photography, I, you know, been working as a professional photographer, and so many other mediums and forms of expression. I love acting, I love writing, I just love creating. So last week, I started school, I started going to college, 43 years old. After high school, I had gone to massage therapy school, which I'm very proud of, I worked so hard, and I put myself through school. And it was an amazing experience, an amazing chapter of my life that led me here to my life on Maui. And now it's time, like, there's no other way for me but to live my truth. And my truth is allowing myself space to create. And so, for so long, I resisted it, feeling like it wasn't practical or serious enough to be successful, to break the generational curses of poverty. I felt all of this pressure and all of this obligation, in many ways, to rise above the hand that I've been dealt. I felt the pain of my ancestors and knowing our stories, you know, I'm Cherokee Native, there's some, there's some Irish and there's some English sprinkled in there, and there's some Blackfoot in there. But at the core, the main story I know of my ancestors and my heritage is that I am Cherokee. And I've always been deeply, deeply connected to that part of myself. My grandfather would share with me medicines and things, and we would go up to Cherokee, Tennessee, any chance that he got, he loved to be there in the environment. It's a calling, it's in the DNA. But I also carried that wound of being done wrong, of being a victim, and felt for so long that I was going to fight, I was going to break that, and I was going to, you know, lift everyone up around me. But I was trying to do it within these systems that are oppressive. And it doesn't work that way. Like, I could fight and push all I want. And nobody can say that I haven't worked hard and that I haven't focused. I have, I've done so many things, and I have been successful with them, but it never lasted. It never lasted because it wasn't what I was meant to be doing. And I know that this decolonization journey at the core of me is such a big part of who I am and why I'm here in this life, why I've chosen to be here in this life. And being able to present it in this way to create a business that supports these values. You know, I'm not working for the algorithm. I'm not choosing topics and keywords that are going to bring me to the top of the search results. I'm following my intuition, and I'm trusting that it's leading me exactly where I'm supposed to be, and that it's leading me to exactly the people that I'm supposed to be led to. But in all of this time and space, it has led me to go back to college. And it feels really good. It feels really good to be following my heart. I am creating. I am taking videography courses. You're welcome. The quality of this will continue to rise. I am taking a social media class. I'm taking ceramics. I'm taking a storytelling class, like things that I feel truly passionate about, and that will help me build this brand and to spread awareness to this message. So aligning with authenticity for me is embracing these desires. Even if they don't fit into the traditional mold of success, embracing that this is part of who I am. That I wouldn't be given these desires if they weren't for me. And that they've stuck with me my whole life. I remember being asked when I was a kid, like, what do you want to be when you grow up? And I'm like, I want to be a painter, and an actor, and a veterinarian. And I wanted to be all the things. Ironically, I'm doing a lot of dog walking and dog sitting these days. And I'm doing a lot of art. So I feel like it's already coming true in so many ways. So again, deconstruction, it's a core part of my work. Not just deconstructing religion, but deconstructing colonialism, patriarchy, and all the systems that have conditioned us away from our true inner knowing, our true selves, and our true desire and calling in this life. My purpose isn't to lead people to what they think they need. It's to help them strip away the layers of conditioning so that they can tune into their own inner knowing and know for themselves without the need for validation. But just have such a strong knowing, and a strong sense of self, and strong sense of purpose, that there is no question about it. Tuning into your true desires. You know, often we think we know what we want. But once we start to process this deconstruction, we realize that our true desires are something else entirely. This process has led me to desires that I had forgotten about and didn't even know that I had. It's led me to everything that I want, and have truly, truly wanted, and been afraid to even want, or to admit that I want, coming together into one place with the alchemy of authenticity. Again, a huge part of this for me is breaking generational curses. Those patterns of behaviors, and thought, and belief that we inherit without question. By decolonizing ourselves and returning to our true selves, we break free from these curses, and we create a new path, not only for ourselves, but for future generations. It's like that saying, you know, we're not here to be good descendants. We're here to be good ancestors. You know, we're not here to please our parents and do what they want. Each generation is more evolved than the one before it. You know, you can look through our history and see that. Pantering to the desires of the generation before us, it may feel good because it's validating something that perhaps we didn't get as children, or that we were conditioned that we needed. But in reality, the true reward comes in being a good ancestor, and creating something that you're proud to leave behind. I was thinking about that with the book Braiding Sweetgrass, and the book that I'm writing, and so many books that have touched my life. It's like, we talk about these ancient and sacred texts, but what we're creating now, you know, the young and free.